This Week in Celebrity Gossip: Lindsay Lohan, porn star

Celebrity gossip items you may have missed this week…

Either the producers of the Linda Lovelace movie that Lindsay Lohan was/is supposed to star in didn’t get the memo that LiLo is pretty much Los Angeles-bound, thanks to her legal difficulties or they’ve moved the set from Texas to California. And I sure hope they don’t think she’s going to get time off for good behavior either because Lindsay has already been out clubbing and frequenting house parties. She’s going to get busted sooner or later, even if she does rub tree oil on her leg or try using a paperclip to jam her SCRAM anklet. Oh, and about the Lovelace movie being shot it Texas?? Never mind… we can scratch that… apparently Lindsay lied to the judge about that. Like I said before, she is so going to the slam.

Here’s further proof that Lindsay has totally got all her sh-t together, y’all…

In other legal news, Heather Locklear will not be charged for running over a no parking sign, because, ummm, cops investigated but could not place Heather behind the wheel of the car that murdered the sign.

So who is going to replace Megan Fox in Transformers 3? First we heard that Gemma Arterton was up for consideration, but now it seems that Victoria’s Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley has the inside track despite the fact that she’s never been in a film before. Maybe the claims that Michael Bay only used Megan in the flick for her looks are true.

For all you Miley Cyrus pedos fans out there, your girl is reported to have gone on a $3,000 lingerie-shopping spree and her boyfriend just moved in with her. Next thing you know Jamie Spears is going to want to take her to court to take charge of all her affairs. Wait, sorry, wrong trailer park family. Sorry.

This is sure to disappoint a few of you. Christina Aguilera has canceled her summer tour amid reports of poor ticket sales. The very tour that she was promoting the face off of. Her people are spinning it differently though. They say it’s been postponed to next year because Aguilera ‘needed more time to rehearse’. Uh huh.

This will also probably disappoint a few of you as well. It seems that, get ready, Stacy Keibler may be a bit of a diva. And no I am not referring to her days in the WWE. Get ready for it… She actually had to wait a few minutes to get her nails done. I KNOW!! According to the National Enquirer, Stacy was so annoyed that she had to wait five minutes for her appointment that she seethed in silence during her manicure session. Man… don’t those people know who she is?! She famous!!

Speaking of famous female singers, apparently Celine Dion’s neighbors hate her and she hasn’t even moved into her house yet. They’re mad because she dug six deep wells to help feed her new home/waterpark and are going to be wasting a sh-tton of fresh water. They say that now, but wait til the first time they get to go on her log flume, then they’ll change their tune.

If you couldn’t stand her before, this might do the trick. Tila Tequila, who just so happens to have just released a music album, announced on her blog that she’s addicted to “prescription pills” and will now appear on Celebrity Rehab. I don’t know who I hate more, Tila or whoever the hell decided to put on a another TV show.

As for people who actually like Tila Tequila, Girls Gone Wild’s Joe Francis is back in the news. This time for hitting a woman – again – allegedly. Oh, did I mention this woman was pregnant? She was pregnant. A pregnant employee. Now I know times are tough, but if you’re a female, any female, would you ever have taken a job working for him in the first place? I don’t like blaming victims of alleged crimes, but there is such a thing as judgment.

Tiki Barber got a rude awakening this week when his wife (soon to be ex-wife, I assume) wouldn’t let him into the delivery room while she gave birth to the couple’s twins. Kinda makes nailing that 23 year-old NBC intern seem kind of dumb now doesn’t it?

The eagerly-anticipated Kendra Wilkinson sex tape is out. No, not on DVD, but all over the freaking Internet. In the interest of mankind I provide you with a link to a link to the video. You’re welcome.

Speaking of ladies doing sexy things, Courtney Love claims that she and Kate Moss once had a lesbian fling. Drop me a comment below if you care.

And lastly, Brittany Murphy’s husband Simon Monjack died this week at the age of 39. People just don’t seem to be living as long these days for some reason.

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